Have Fun With Snake Wagon

by Snake Wagon

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about

Have Fun With Snake Wagon is the debut effort from Youngstown, Ohio's own gospel-comedy band, Snake Wagon. Born out of twistedness and raised in revelation, the band takes its love of Christmas Caroling, Wall Drug, South Dakota, and Chinese astronomy, and transforms it daily into a truly unique and innovative sound that recalls early Motorhead having a coffee, no cream, with Linda McCartney. As the son of a Wal-Mart Greeter and Youngstown's first female chair of the Libertarian Committee, Thom Jefferson, along with his childhood friend/violinist Ulf Zarkanius, rebelled against their fore-bearers and formed Snake Wagon in 1985, as a vehicle to spread their anarchistic belief system. In 1986, Daniel Johnston notably stated, "They're alright."

After nearly three decades of playing the Youngstown circuit, Providence, Rhode Island's folk outfit The Low Anthem discovered Snake Wagon in a rest-stop 57 miles outside Columbus, where Snake Wagon was amidst their four-year residency at that rest-stop's Tim Hortons. "I wasn't too sure what I was hearing. I was literally relieving myself when I heard this ungodly sound," said Low Anthem bassist/drummer Jeff Prystowsky. "I wasn't sure if I loved it or hated it. I think I hated it, but after they played for nearly four hours, we all sort of warmed up to it. Maybe it was the endless supply of Tim Hortons’ sasuage patties that helped." In that rest-stop, the two bands formed a friendship based on their love of our nations 11th President James K. Polk, midwestern songwriter Hoagy Carmichael, and hoagies.

The Low Anthem proceeded to invite Snake Wagon to their studio, a 40,000 square foot abandoned pasta sauce factory outside Providence. It was Snake Wagon's first time outside of Ohio and their first time in a proper recording facility. In a creative rage, Mr. Jefferson locked the doors to the pasta sauce factory, holding the Low Anthem, their friends The Barr Brothers, and producer/engineer Jesse Lauter hostage and at gunpoint, forcing them all to record ten of his crowning works in a matter of 48 hours, literally interrupting the recording of the Low Anthem's album Smart Flesh. They even managed to kidnap ESPN baseball analyst Peter Gammons from his Brookline, Mass home in order to fulfill his dream of including his idol on his debut record. In the process, Zarkanius became jealous of Thom's new musical mates and fled the studio, effectively leaving Snake Wagon for rival Youngstown band The Devil's Daughter. But the record went on... and the result is Have Fun With Snake Wagon, a legendary record, as the long-lost second-cousin-once-removed of David Byrne says, "It's as good as they've ever been, and maybe even better."

credits

released 20 December 2011

Thomas Jefferson: lead vocals, guitar
Benjamin Franklin: bass, vocals
Abigail Adams: saxophone, clarinet, vocals
Martin Van Buren: piano, pump organ, fiddle
Aaron Burr: drums
Alexander Hamilton: electric guitar
James Madison: vocals
Betsy Ross: vocals
Peter Gammons: commentary

special thanks to: Rolf

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about

Snake Wagon Bengaluru, India

Snake Wagon is a virus. H14D2S. It came originally from Africa, and is poised to take over all living bodies in a post-DNA era. symptoms of arrest: trance, anxiety, prophylactic shock, reptilian ancestral awareness, defamation of character, certitude, unabashed desire to replicate. ... more

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Track Name: Give It All Away
Give all my money away, Give all my money away, I'm gonna give all my money away, and give up this life of sin,
Give all my money away, Give all my money away, I'm gonna give all my money away, and become a pious man.

I used to be a wealthy businessman, had many fine cars and vacation homes
But then my wife left me, and I was all alone.
But a door to door salesman showed me the way
And I realized why my life was in decay
And so I took an oath, to leave that life behind

I'm gonna...

But wait, can't I keep my desk, it's only that I use it to read the bible
And can't I keep my bed for to pray upon
Just a few things to help me through, a television set and a car that's new
They will only help to keep me honest and true

While I....

Well, the priest told me it is fine with him, to keep the homes, it is no sin
As long as I paid my tithe each month on time
So I bought me a few more things to prepare, a gold-plated cross, and a gold-plated bear
And I kept my job, so I could continue to give in the years to come

When I...

So I guess my life's about the same as before, got my cars and vacation homes I adore
But my heart is healed cause I learned the golden rule still applies
It says, treat others like you would treat yourself
That's why my priest always wears a gold-studded belt
And we're as happy now as we've ever felt in our lives.

Cause we...
Track Name: Law of Inevitability
There are many laws in the universe
Some we know some we're waiting to see
But my favorite one of them all
Is the Law of Inevitability

You might think I'm not your type
"Cause I'm shorter than you'd like me to be
Thank God in two years time you'll be my wife
Due to the Law of Inevitability

What a fine law! What a magic hand!
That reveals life's pleasures to man.
If only I could meet the one above
I'd tell him I'm his number-one fan.

There are many laws in the universe
Some we know some we're waiting to see
But my favorite one of them all
Is the Law of Inevitability

The government's gone to hell and back
We've all lost our jobs and tv's
But you just wait, heaven's just around the gate
Due to the Law of Inevitability

There are many laws in the universe
Some we know some we're waiting to see
But my favorite one of them all
Is the Law of Inevitability
Track Name: Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am
Mama said, "Son, you'd better get yourself a girl, I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"
"She'd better be rich and pretty, son." I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"
And not one or the other but both must be
For a pretty girl 'aint nothing if her pockets are free
Momma said, "Son, you'd better get yourself a girl, I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"

So I went to school and started lookin
For a girl who would get my mind a-cookin
But none fit the mold that momma would find a catch
But Miss Laura Lee she was tall and handsome
Boy, she sure did strike my fancy
She's as pretty as the movies and rich as a million pence
She must me, to be teaching us sixth grade science.

She said, "Son, you'd better do all your homework." I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"
"And it better all be done, not half and half, I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"
Just as long as when the schoolday's done
You'll come home with me and teach me right from wrong
Mamma said, "Son, you'd better get yourself a girl." I said, "Yes Ma'am, Yes Ma'am!"

Can you believe it? I took home my sixth grade science teacher!

"Good mornin' momma! This here's Miss Lee, she's my science teacher, as pretty as can be
She spent the night and helped me with my homework, would you like some eggs with your pancake syrup?
What do you think momma, can she move in today?"

Well, four strips of bacon, eggs, and toast
Two eyes looking at me like they've seen a ghost
Momma 'aint sayin' nothing, she's on the floor
Must have been those eggs du jour
I said, "Momma, I've finally got myself a girl!"
Yes ma'am, Yes ma'am.
Track Name: (Don't You Really Mean to Say You) Love Me So
What you say is what you get
And what you said, you can't take back
And now you say you love another
Do you really mean you love me so?

When we met I swore the day
You'd come and take my breath away
But now you say our love's gone asunder
Do you really mean you love me so?

You held my hand so close and tight
We went to dinner, you stole the night
And then you said our love was masochistic
Did you really mean you loved me so?

If time could talk I'd ask him this
Why does love predict my every wish?
And when she says she loves me
And changes her mind every day
Who is a man to trust?

What happened to the days when
What you said was what you get
And what you said, you can't take back
And when you say you love another
You don't really mean you love me so
Track Name: I Am Every Boston Singer
I am every Boston singer
This is the only riff I can finger
I play this riff and no one listens
'Cause it's so damn cold
And we're all getting old
Or so I'm told

I play this riff for hours on end
How did it become a trend?
Now I'm playing it just to stay warm too
'Cause it's so damn cold
There's nothing much else to do

But I know why there's nobody listening
It's cause the Red Sox are on
It's cause the Red Sox are on
It's cause the Red Sox are on

Either the Red Sox are winning
Nobody's listening
Or the Red Sox are losing
Nobody's listening
Or the Red Sox are doing O.K. they tied it up
Nobody's listening

I made my band from Berklee's A-list
I just found them all on craig's list
We all have our Myspace pages
The players all are different ages
Track Name: Honey You Can Keep The Money
Met you at a gig in Memphis, girl, you played those drums so well
I couldn't help but stare at your drum throne
It was so pretty just-a sittin there

I asked you if I could see it
You said, yes, long as I didn't have a girl
I said, no, but I'd still like to see it
Would you mind if I sat in it alone?

Honey you can keep the money
Long as I can keep that throne
I'll give you back all that you're wanting
If you'll please just leave us alone

Well, we dated for quite a long while
But soon all my love you disowned
You beat down my heart like a floor tom
Dropped me like a dog to a bone

When finally you left I packed up your things
And brought them to the post office door
I split up the money half and half like we agreed
But I couldn't bear to leave that throne

Honey, you can keep the money
Long as I can keep that throne
I'll give you back all that you're wanting
If you'll please just leave us alone

I'm sorry baby, I know I told you I lost it
But it's sitting right here next to me
Now that you're on the other side of the country
I thought I'd tell you, you see
Track Name: You Had To Be There Talkin' Blues
I met someone somewhere doing something with someone
I don't recall who, what, where, or why exactly
But it was a big deal, and funny to most
Posted it all on hilarity.net immediately
To which someone commented, "That 'aint a story, let me tell you this!"

I met someone somewhere and we said something to each other
I can't recall what, or where, or who, or why either
But you can read my blog about it
It was so funny I nearly fell off my chair
Talkin LOL, laugh out loud funny
Posted it on you'llneverseethatoneagain.com
To which someone commented, "I've seen that one before, but let me tell you this!"

I met someone somewhere who asked me this question
I thought it was a fine question
But couldn't recall the answer, or for that matter, the question
When he asked it, who he was, or why he asked it
Well, I looked it all up on alltheanswersyou'lleverneedandmore.org
It was real, real funny, so funny I just had to text my sister about it
To which someone commented, "Seen it already! But this one I swear is worth reading about! We're talkin' headliner material!"

I heard a loud crash when I was walking down the street
When I looked up, I saw something that I had never seen before
Someone was doing something somewhere to someone that you wouldn't believe
At least I remember that much, and man, I was on the floor I was laughing so loud, I was nearly cryin'!
Posted it all on ohIlovethatone.com

It's all there I tell ya, all there on the internet
Every story you could ever want about anyone, anywhere, doin anything with anybody!
There's only one thing, and what is it again?
Well, I guess you had to be there to know.
Track Name: Dirty Crustacean
Bayou country, feeling good
Down in New Orleans where the eatin's good
Met me a man, working in a kitchen
Cooked me all of them fine cajun fixings

Ate well for awhile, then it all went sour
First he forgot to salt the gumbo flour
Now he insists that I peel my own shrimp
Well, baby, enough is enough

Don't go filling my basin with your dirty crustaceans for I've found me another man

Moved up to Maine it was colder there
Strolling by the fish market in the New England square
Met me a man working the lobster traps
Had claw bites all up his arm, down his back

Ate well for awhile, then it all went sour
First he forgot to marinate with chili powder
Now I can't help but think he has no taste at all
Well, baby, enough is enough

Don't go filling my basin with your dirty crustaceans for I've found me another man

The Chesapeake called so I wearily went
To see if love could pay my rent
Met me a man who looked real invitin'
He fed me well when the crabs were bitin'

But lately I've been getting this awful feeling
Ever since he made me crab cakes out of season
Now I'm thinking it's time to go again
'Cause, baby, enough is enough

Don't go filling my basin with your dirty crustaceans for I've found me another man
Track Name: Those Lesbian Blues
Baby, bread my jelly and butter my jam
Make me forget I ever needed a man

Peel my onions, and rub my thighs
I can't get enough of your sweet honey eyes

Flip me over easy, toast me even brown
I'll be thinking of you, baby, sun up till sun down

Stuff me with your filling, lay me with your spread
I'll be waiting for you right here in bed

Milk me with your honey, warm me with your brush
Who needs a man when you can have a woman's touch?
Track Name: Oh, Lolita
Oh, Lolita, you said you were 23
Then they told me you're not a day over 17
How I wish the law wouldn't come between us, my darling
Oh, Lolita, you're my cause of misery

Do you remember the first time that we met?
I was driving around in my ice cream truck
I said, "That's 3 dollars please, but for you I'll make it free
If you'd join me behind the playground at half past 3."

Oh, Lolita, you said you were 23
Then they told me you;re not a day over 17
How I wish the law wouldn't come between us, my darling
Oh, Lolita, you're my cause of misery

It was just an ordinary Halloween before they caught us
I had my basket of special apples for all the kids
You joined me in my unmarked white van for to make sweet love
Then the cops pulled up and the rest is history

Just four more years in this jail cell, and then we'll be together
I will wait for you, will you wait for me?
Who cares what other think of us?
They don't know our love is true.

Oh, Lolita, you said you were 23
Then they told me you're not a day over 17
How I wish the law wouldn't come between us, my darling
Oh, Lolita, you're my cause of misery.